What a fucking horrible day :’(

Went into school feeling terrible as usual, had to try and stop myself bursting into tears numerous times. Had my weekly meeting with the school counsellor, who knows nothing about my self harm, yet for some reason at the end of the session, she handed me a self harm leaflet and said “there are lots of people you can talk to.. you can just have a look at this website (www.selfharm.co.uk)”

How does she know? :’( The fucking effort I make to hide my arms. Or maybe she’s just assuming I self harm because of how I behaved or what I said to her or something, but great.. So now she’s probably going to talk to my mum, then my mum will want to look at my arms or something and find out I’m still cutting and I never stopped. Then god knows I’ll probably end up back on a psychiatric ward. FUCK FUCK FUCK. :’(

I don’t know what to do.

Lying all the time.

Covering everything up.

They’re all going to find out.

How fucked up I really am.

How fucked up I still am.

I can’t cope with this. I really can’t.

I really don’t know what to do.